“She’s going on the op, Knight. Nigel promised my bosses that you would take care of this.” Ten glared Nigel’s way. “Get control of your people. I’m going to talk to Tag, but I fully expect that blonde out there on Knight’s arm when he goes to meet Champion. Losing those agents would set US intelligence back by years.”
“It won’t be a party for us either,” Nigel shot back. “We will take care of it.”
Ten stopped, staring at Damon for a moment. “He screwed the girl over. I doubt she’s going to help us out.”
“She will,” Nigel replied with surety. “She’s been with SIS for a long time. She’ll do her job. Miss Cash is loyal.”
Yes, she was. Which was exactly why he’d had to break with her in a way that would bust her loyalty to him.
She would have walked beside him into hell, and he couldn’t allow that. “She’s not coming with me. I won’t do the job with her. Do you understand me? I will not work with that woman.”
“Is there any way we could find someone who looks like me? I would be willing to spend time with her so she could get my mannerisms down.” Penelope stepped into the room, the folder against her chest as though she thought it was a wall to protect her. “If Mr. Knight won’t deign to work with me, I’ll do whatever I can to help out. I understand how important this is.”
Naturally, she’d heard the worst. And his stupid cock didn’t care that he’d blown their relationship to hell. His idiotic dick just knew she’d walked in the room and called him Mr. Knight in her soft, polite voice, like he was some character out of a bloody Jane Austen novel. He wanted to hear her call him Mr. Knight while he shoved his cock in her arse.
But she wouldn’t let him do that now. Before, he could have taken her in every way it was possible to take a woman. She’d been his from the moment he’d asked her to work with him. That was gone now. He wouldn’t meet another Penelope. He’d met his match, and it was done.
“We can put a blonde wig on someone. She’s right. Someone else would be better.” Anything to keep her far away.
“No. She’s going to stay with you for the duration.” Nigel sighed. “You’re like two children. I have to play the father figure. You will work together. You will play your parts. There will be no substitutions. There’s too much at stake. Penelope, you will not walk away from this operation. You will go on the cruise with Knight and you will aid him both in finding the terrorist and discovering what Champion has to do with all of this.”
She shook those blonde curls he loved to sink his fingers into. “I’ll be what you need.”
So fucking brave. She could have been his. All that strength would have been his had fucking Baz not screwed him over. His fists tightened. His. Fucking his. She belonged to him as no female ever had before and she wouldn’t look at him.
Because he’d burned that bridge, and he knew damn well no one got second chances.
She was far from him. No matter how close, she wouldn’t allow him to touch her. Wouldn’t allow him access to her. She’d spread her legs before and welcomed him. She’d tossed aside her every inhibition for him. She’d been his in every way that had mattered.
Now she wouldn’t look at him and his insides hurt. Baz had shot him but the fact that Penelope wouldn’t look at him was worse.
She stood apart. There was no chair for her. He and Ten were taking them up.
Damon practically leapt out of his seat. She should expect courtesy. From him. From every bloody man in the world. She was a woman. It didn’t matter if the man wasn’t fucking her. She deserved his chair, his protection.
She didn’t move to the seat. It was empty. He felt empty, too.
He wanted to hold her. She’d been so bloody perfect in his arms. She’d fit against him like he’d been missing a piece of himself and he’d finally been made whole.
He’d lost everyone. But just for a moment, he’d thought he would be okay. He would never get over the loss of Penelope Cash. A flash went through him. She was the one. He didn’t believe in love in a tangible sense, but he did think that there were rewards the universe gave out. For surviving, for bravery, for saving those who couldn’t help themselves.
She’d been his prize, and he’d lost her.
Like he’d lost everything else.
“I would like to talk to you alone,” Nigel said. He wasn’t talking to Damon. Bloody hell. An hour ago, it wouldn’t have happened. He would have told Penelope no, and she would have stayed at his side so Nigel would have treated them like a team. Unbreakable.
They were so broken now.
“Of course, sir.” Her words were a brutal monotone. Nothing like her usual lyrical speech. He loved the way she talked. Her ebullience made his heart beat faster, but there was none of it now. Staccato. She spoke in hard rhythms.
“Excellent.” Nigel pulled his chair up. He turned to Damon. “Damon, you will continue with the operation as though nothing has happened. Everything must appear normal. I’ll let you know when we get the information on the meet spot. It will likely be at the last minute so we have absolutely no chance to send in a team.”
He would wait until they stopped in a foreign port and pull them from their assignment. There would be no time for protection. He would be on his own. He would have to shelter her.
He would have to stay with her. Train her. Protect her.
She would have nowhere else to go. How the hell would he keep his hands off her?
Nigel frowned his way. “I believe I explained I need to speak to Miss Cash alone.”
“I would rather stay.” He sent Nigel a look he should recognize. It was his arrogant look. The one that said he would accept nothing less than absolute control. He was in control of Penelope Cash. He’d been her handler. He’d been willing to give up everything for her. A man got one girl. One woman who understood him. One woman who could change his destiny. Penelope was it. And Baz had fucked him.
He didn’t deserve her. He had to find a way to get her to walk away.
“No.” Nigel’s frown told him everything he needed to know. “I want to talk to her on my own. She’ll be with you in a moment.”
Damon stood. He couldn’t humiliate her again. Couldn’t argue his place with her. He’d blown that.
He schooled his expression. “If Penelope wants it, then yes.”