“What? No. Kathy, it’s not like that.”
She wrapped her arms around herself. “It feels like that.”
“No. I’m just helping the mother of my children get through the hardest time of her life.” He reached for her arms again. “Honey, I’m sorry this has hurt you.”
She pulled back slightly. Her body shook under his hands. “It hurts so much.”
“I never meant for it to. I love you.”
“Then keep your distance from her.” She turned and seared a look at him that made it perfectly clear the ultimatum if he didn’t. “Please, do this for me.”
He looked into Kathy’s tear-filled eyes. He looked down at his chest. It felt as though she’d pushed a knife through his heart. How could he not take care of Maddie? How could he just walk away?
The thought of the kiss he’d shared with Madeline raced through his head. What was he doing? But he had to be honest with himself. He’d let Madeline go years ago. This was his chance to be the husband he should have been then. Carlos nodded. “Okay. I’ll step back.”
Chapter Seven
Carlos’s hand fidgeted over the phone as he sat at his desk. The students had long left the building, and his own kids were home waiting for him to arrive. But he couldn’t move. He couldn’t leave until he called Madeline and made sure she was all right.
A phone call wouldn’t break his promise to Kathy. A phone call wouldn’t hurt.
He finally dialed her number and waited for her to answer.
“Hello.” Her voice was soft and gentle. That was Madeline. Soft and gentle.
“Maddie.”
“Carlos!” Her voice rose, and he could hear her smile. “I almost didn’t recognize myself this morning. I have to tell you. I laughed right out loud when I saw myself in the mirror.”
Warmth spread through his body. “I’ll bet you still look great.”
“Thank you.”
She was laughing. She was fine. He could hang up and know that she’d be okay.
“Hey, I just wanted to check on you. It doesn’t look like I’m going to be able to make it to go shopping for a few days.”
“Oh, that’s okay. I’m getting this scarf thing down pretty well. They don’t look too bad.”
“Good.” A lump formed in his throat.
“Arianna called me this morning. She’s going to be here a few weeks between shows and to throw your fiancée a bridal shower. She’s got a few wigs from performances cluttering up her closet. She’s going to bring them down for me.”
“That’s nice.” His voice cracked and he swallowed that lump of raw emotion—deception for making the phone call—that had lodged in his throat.
“Carlos, is something wrong? You don’t sound all right.”
“No. I’m fine,” he lied, and the palm of his hand sweated against the phone. “I’ve just got a lot on my plate and I’m trying to find time for it all.”
“Well, if you’d stop fussing over me, you’d have more time,” she offered.
He picked up a pencil that lay on his desk and snapped it in two with his thumb. “I’m not fussing.”
“You’re a good man, do you know that?”
He shook his head. He didn’t feel like a good man, not when he was sneaking phone calls to his ex-wife when his fiancée asked him to keep clear of her.
“Call me if you need anything. I’ll have the kids take the bus to your house on Monday, and they can stay with you next week.”
“I miss them already. Isn’t that crazy? It’s not like they weren’t here just yesterday.”
“No, I understand it.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’ll talk to you later.”
He ended the call and dropped his head in his hands. God, he didn’t know trying not to care for someone could be as hard as caring too much.
Kathy had decided to get married on a Saturday morning in April in the backyard of his sister’s house among a small group of friends and family. It was February already, and Carlos knew that the eight weeks before the wedding were going to be a combat zone wrapped in pink.
“I need you to make me a list of people you want to invite. I think I know everyone, but just in case I miss someone.” Kathy handed him a notebook and a pen.
“How many people are we going to be able to get into Regan’s rose garden?” he asked as he looked at pages that she’d titled CARLOS’S FRIENDS.
“I think we could get seventy-five people in there.”
“Seventy-five?”
“Well, you have to think, with your family alone that’s. .” She began calculating. “That’s twelve if you count spouses, dates, and kids.”
“Not to mention my long list of dearest friends.” He shook his head.
“Shut up and make your list.” She gave him a wink as she went back about making her own list.
He couldn’t help but think of the people he was putting on his list. It felt odd to put people down who had been there to see him marry Madeline. Most of them were relatives. He’d never kept too many friends. Matt Carson had been his closest friend in the world. He stood next to Curtis at the altar with him the day he married Madeline. He never would have guessed then he’d have lost his wife to the man he’d thought of as a brother.
Carlos shook his head. Sometimes you were blinded by friendship and love, and you never could see the wolf lurking in the person’s clothing.
Matt had spent hours with him when problems with Madeline had begun. He had been his confidant, his sounding board, his strength. What kind of man takes that brotherhood and stabs you?
Matthew Carson, that’s what kind of man. The same man who moved his way into Madeline’s heart and convinced her to marry him only months after their divorce was final. Then five years later walked out on her when she needed him the most.
He let out a breath. Who needed friends when they were like Matt Carson?
They combined their lists. He had twenty. She had forty-three.
She looked up from his list, her brows drawn together. “Madeline isn’t on your list.”
“No. I left her off.”
“Why?”
“Kathy, you can’t tell me to leave her alone and then want me to have her there for the wedding.”