“Honored, sweetheart,” he murmured.
“You shouldn’t be. You’re my man. Of course I’d start with you,” she returned, injecting a lilt into her voice in hopes of lightening the atmosphere.
“You need to call Leigh. Felicia. Mira. Things are happening.”
That didn’t sound good.
“What things?” she asked.
“Penn and Shane are getting married.”
That got him another full smile as she thought of the Master and his slave whom she knew in and out of the life, how long they’d been together, how good they were together in all ways and how happy she was for them.
“I know. Shane texted. I texted back but haven’t connected other than that. I’ll give him a call. It’s so exciting!” She ended that with a genuine jump in her seat because she loved Penn and Shane, she was thrilled for them and it was about time they made it official.
“Leigh is living with her man, Evangeline,” Aryas continued. “His name is Olly. Solid guy. Yin to her yang. She’s all class, as you know. He looks like a bouncer at a bar run by the Irish mafia. But what he is, is a firefighter. She’s deep with him, over the moon to be right there. For his part, she lights his world and he doesn’t hide it.”
Evangeline couldn’t be happier for her friend. Amélie had been looking for that and Evangeline was glad she’d found it, mostly because she was a good woman, a good friend—she deserved it.
“I know that too, Ary. Leigh told me. Left a few voicemails. I e-mailed her back. Also Felicia, Mira, Romy, they all told me, and I could go on. Everyone’s thrilled for her so I look forward to meeting him.”
“Mira’s also got a man,” he continued.
She shifted, suddenly ill at ease.
Life went on.
And she was missing it.
Deliberately.
Oh yes, she had to pull herself together.
“I know, honey,” she said softly. “Mira called. Left a voicemail. I’ve been meaning to call her and I will. Right after this. She and her man are both putting their houses up for sale and they’re buying something together. They want me to list them and show them some places. I need to get on that for them.”
In her defense, something she wasn’t going to share with Aryas because it was lame, Mira had only called about this three days ago.
But in her job, three days was two and three-quarter days too long for her to return the call.
“Sixx is back,” he shared.
“I heard that too,” she replied uncomfortably.
Aryas tipped his head slightly to the side, his gaze on her becoming intent.
“You here, does that mean you’re coming back to the club?”
She straightened, shaking her head slightly, and lifted her plastic cup to take a sip before she answered.
“I don’t think that’s something that’s going to be in the future for me, Ary.”
“Evangeline—”
She lifted a hand but lowered her voice. “Love you. Love that you’re looking out for me. Feel like an idiot and worse, a jerk for going into my head then falling into work and not reaching out to everyone. Sorting myself out. And I’ll be reconnecting, with everyone. But that…,” she shook her head, “that part of my life is behind me.”
Arya’s face turned hard with concern. “That part of your life is part of you.”
“Ary, I messed up.”
“Leenie, he was messed up. That was not on you.”
“I don’t know that for certain. What I do know for certain is that it wasn’t on you.”
His face closed down.
“It wasn’t, Ary,” she stressed.
“I should have read it on him,” he returned. “Fuck, I should have smelled it on him.”
“I didn’t and I spent much more time with him.”
“You had other things on your mind.”
She did.
Love.
Marriage.
Babies.
A life together.
God, she’d been such a fool.
“I think he surprised everyone,” she told Aryas.
“He did. Everyone. But it’s my job not to be surprised.”
“Ary—”
This time, he lifted a hand.
And he was better at it.
She snapped her mouth shut.
Aryas spoke.
“Babe, you gotta let me carry that load because no way in fuck there’s a thing you can say or do to make me let it go. You walk in that front door, you depend not on the person you’re with to keep you safe, you depend on me to keep you safe. You’re not answering an ad and taking the risk with whoever shows. You’re not at the Bolt and needing to worry about how they clean or even if they clean up after the ones who went before you. The Honey is your sanctuary. And it’s on me to provide that.”
Evangeline didn’t reply so Aryas kept speaking.
“He’s taken care of. I told you that and it’s true. He won’t hurt you again. He won’t hurt anyone again. I saw to that. That’s done. But I gotta live with the blame so I stay sharp in order to make certain it doesn’t happen again.”
Evangeline had no idea how Aryas had taken care of Kevin. She held some guilt about this too. Kevin clearly needed help.
It was just, with what he’d done to her, she’d made the decision that it wasn’t her that should help.
She doubted Aryas got him into counseling.
That said, if ever there was a time to pull your own self together, examine what was going on in your head—beating the crap out of, not your Mistress, but your girlfriend, was that time.
In other words, at least she’d forgiven herself for not assisting in that and doing so, had allowed herself to move on and heal. After Kevin did what he’d done, she knew that whatever happened to him was not her concern.
She’d been falling in love with him. Thinking about a future with him. And he’d been right there with her. So she couldn’t stop herself from hoping he’d gotten help and feeling some remorse that she hadn’t stepped up to be a part of that.
But the first time his fist connected with her face, he lost the right to expect her to be there for him.
And she gained the right for that to be okay.
“I’ll give you that,” she said softly.
“Obliged,” he replied with a quirk to his lips. But immediately after that, he pushed, “Be more obliged, you came back to the club.”
She sighed and began, “Aryas—”
“Get you don’t want to and won’t push it. Hope you do. Hope you get over it. Hope you come back to us and to you in all the ways you should do that. You can’t find that in you…” He shrugged but didn’t stop coming at her. “That’s the way it is. I can’t push that. You gotta find that in you. But connecting with you. Seeing where you’re at. Getting you to come back to the family. Taking your pulse is only part of why I asked you here. I also got another reason.”
Evangeline took another sip of her coffee before she asked, “And what’s that?”
“Got a sub for you.”
She blinked and her stomach pitched.
“Sorry?” she queried.
“Perfect for you. No strings. No boundaries. This guy is not looking to connect. He’s not looking for a relationship. Hell, sheer number of Dommes he goes through, you might only get one crack at him before he vanishes from your life. But at least you’ll get off the way you like it that one time. And if you can keep him around awhile, you might have some fun, break yourself back in, give yourself what you need, without any baggage.”
Um.
Whoa.
That all sounded way too good to be true.
But still.
“I’m not … I don’t think…” She swallowed. “I’m not ready for that, and to be honest, Ary, I’m not sure I’ll ever go back there.”
“Fool thing to think, more fool thing to do,” Aryas returned instantly. “Especially when you got a chance to have a go with this guy. You got a shot at a guy like this guy, you should take it. And I mean that for you. Only for you. For where you’re at. For what I suspect you need about now. He doesn’t want to hold hands. He doesn’t want to share a drink in the hunting ground. He doesn’t want you to give him your number or stake your claim on him in the club or anywhere. He wants you to get him off and he’s open to anything you wanna do to pull that off.”