You’re just a dumb piece of beefcake, Jake. I was never going to marry you. I’m not going to spend my life with a grunt no matter how well trained he is. Adam is a man I could see marrying, but you ruined him. Now he doesn’t even have a career.
He helped Serena up because she was Adam’s girl. Not his. He wasn’t going to fuck it up for Adam again.
Serena stood there looking at him, her big eyes threatening to pull him in. “I’m sorry, Sir.”
He shook his head. “No, I apologize. I didn’t get what you wanted. No problem, Serena. And just call me Jake.”
It would be too hard to listen to her call him “Sir” in that breathy Texas twang of hers, not when it wasn’t real. He didn’t want to play with Serena. He wanted it to be real. He’d been an idiot, doing exactly what he’d promised Ian he wouldn’t do. He’d been thinking with his heart and not his head.
“Tell me you’re not playing with me.”
Serena’s soft words made him turn around. She looked small and fragile standing there in her miniskirt and corset, her bare feet on the carpet.
He sighed. “I’m not going to hurt you, Serena. I promise. No swats. Nothing at all. You need to stay by my side because you don’t know your way around, but no one is going to touch you.”
Her fists clenched at her sides. “Damn it, Jake, that wasn’t what I meant.”
He hated being cursed at, especially by subs, but she was the client and his best friend’s crush. “Then please explain what you want, Serena. I’m here to meet your needs.”
She shook her head. “I don’t want this. I want it the way it was just a few minutes ago, but I’m scared. Not of you. God, Jacob, we need to work on your self-esteem. You’re so gorgeous I have a hard time looking at you, but the first place your brain goes to when I talk is that I’m rejecting you. I’m not. I’m scared that this is going to be the best experience of my life and you’ll just walk away afterward and never think of me again. That’s what I’m scared of. And I think you’ll spank really hard. I probably will cry and maybe scream and I’ll make a fool of myself. But if you’ll just tell me that this means something, anything, to you, then I’ll be okay. Jake, I’m not asking for an engagement ring or a permanent collar, I just want to know that you like me, that this isn’t something you’re doing because Adam pushed you to it.”
God, he was crazy about her. No other woman in the world would have accused him of having self-esteem issues, but Serena just put it all out there. She laid it on the line and stood there waiting for his judgment. For his honesty. It was a beautiful thing.
“Serena, I don’t know if this is going to go anywhere,” he admitted. “You get that Adam and I share, right?”
She nodded. “Yeah, I don’t seem to have a problem with that.”
“It can be rough on a woman. And we haven’t known each other for long.”
“I know. But this whole lifestyle is about being brave enough to try, isn’t it? I got the shit kicked out of me, Jake. My husband did a number on me. There’s this piece deep inside that wants to hide and pretend I don’t need anyone, but I need to be braver than that. I want to explore this with you. And all I really ask is that if you decide you don’t want me, treat me with a little kindness, okay? I’m a big girl. I can handle it, but I want some kindness.”
His heart hurt for her. He couldn’t fucking help it anymore. He reached out and pulled her close, her hands on his skin for the first time. He wrapped himself around her as though he could protect her from all the shit coming her way. Kindness was the least she should expect from the men she shared her body with. Kindness, tenderness, affection. She was starving for them.
“I can handle the kindness, Serena,” he whispered in her ear. Fuck, he wasn’t going to be able to keep his hands off her now. No way. He just had to hold off until Adam could be around. But Adam had already had a taste. It was only fair he got a kiss, too. He nuzzled her ear, reveling in the little sigh she made. It felt right to be so close to her. He kissed her, his lips finding her cheek first and then the soft edge of her mouth.
The minute her mouth flowered open beneath his, he nearly lost control. She was so fucking perfect for him. He loved her curves and the way she practically melted into him. Her hands were tentative as they found his waist, but she gripped him, using him for balance. That was what he wanted, to balance her and make her the center of his desire.
He kissed her, licking a demanding path across her lips, telling her with a little growl what he wanted.
She sighed, and her tongue came out to dance with his. He took over, dominating her mouth, his hands tangling in her hair so he could move her the way he wanted. He hauled her close, wanting not a fucking centimeter of distance between them. His cock ground against her belly. He needed to get her higher. She was petite, small against him. He would have to shove her against a wall in order to get her to the right height so he could thrust his cock deep.
He started to maneuver her toward the wall when he heard heels clicking along the floor that led to the locker room.
“Should I get you a privacy room?” Eve’s voice was a shock to his system. Fuck. He’d forgotten where they were. It wasn’t like he hadn’t fucked a couple of subs in full view of the dungeon, but he didn’t just go at it in front of the locker room. What was he thinking? And he couldn’t fuck Serena. Not without Adam.
Jake pulled away. His head was cloudy, but he managed to focus on Eve. She was dressed to kill in a perfectly tailored miniskirt and corset. It was rather like Serena’s, but Eve was slender and her hair was perfectly done. There wasn’t a thing messy about Eve. Hair, nails, and makeup all perfect. He was certain the five-inch stilettos on her feet were some designer who charged so much for a pair of shoes that Jake’s eyeballs would bulge. So why was messy, plump Serena the one who called to him? Why did the sight of her bare feet turn him on? He held her hand in his. Her nails were short, and there were calluses all over her hands. She used them all day. She typed, and when she was plotting, she would get out a pen or a marker and write all over a notebook or her white board. He fucking loved her hands. He pulled one to his mouth and placed a kiss on her palm.
“Sorry,” he said to Eve, holding Serena close. “I got carried away. And I forgot all about the discipline my sub requires.”