He shook his head, starting the car.
“Where are you going? The next four blocks are the Sliver, which is neutral territory, but the entire city beyond that is the Varden, which is controlled by the ventala.”
“Maybe a visit there will help me figure out what they want from me.”
“So you’re just going to do what? Drive around? See if something seems familiar while half the ventala in the Varden may be hunting you?”
“If you wish to know, come with me.”
She still felt slightly disoriented from the kiss and the dorm room vision. Had it been a memory? One of his? Or just a dream that felt real? “No, Nathaniel. Driving around randomly makes no sense. Come inside the Etherlin with me and tell me what you remember, so we can figure things out together.”
“I don’t know where I belong, but it’s not inside those walls.”
She glared at him.
“I’ll return for you, Kate.”
“Don’t you dare leave.”
“I’m not yours to command,” Nathaniel said, scowling as he swung the wheel. He drove away. Feeling crestfallen, she stared after him until the jeep disappeared.
Finally, she turned to Grant. “What do you think?” she asked, saying what they were all wondering. “Is he a fallen angel?”
“He may be. According to legend, the angels who rose against God were cast out. Those who embraced the rebellion were damned to hell. Those who regretted their choice were doomed to walk the earth, always seeking God’s forgiveness, which would be withheld forever. They’re tortured souls without a seat at the table of the afterlife.”
“A lonely existence.”
“Exactly. I’m sure he’d enjoy having someone to ease that loneliness, but what would that mean for you?”
“Heaven’s gates would be barred against me, too,” she said, shivering.
“Very likely, which is why you should come inside and never see him again.”
“I have a connection to him. It’s palpable.”
“I’m sure it is. Remember that if he’s trying to trick you, he’s more than fallen. He’s damned. Don’t forget that higher demons are experts in subterfuge and temptation.”
Yes, he could be trying to trick me, she thought, but he’s not. A part of me already belongs to him, whether I want it to or not.
“It’s time,” Tamberi said, glancing at the clock and tapping her foot nervously. She opened the grimoire.
“All right, don’t get your panties in a bunch,” Cato said.
“No. At least not yet,” she said with a sly smile as she started reading from the book. The floor cracked open, and orange light spilled from the center. Flames danced up, singeing the curtains and the dangling hair of the sacrifices who screamed behind their gags.
When the ritual was finished, seconds ticked by and orange and white flames exploded in the circle. Smoke writhed and took shape. Bones clattered and creaked, covering themselves in flesh as pale as milk.
Gadreel rose from his crouched position. White-blond hair hung around his exquisite face, and eyes of the brightest blue stared at them. The corner of his mouth curved into a smile.
“Hello, world of men, so nice to see you again.” His left hand slid lazily down his flat belly to stroke himself. “What have we here, Tamberi? You had a helper?”
She nodded. “My brother, Cato.”
Gadreel laughed and stepped out of the circle. With his free hand, he cupped her face. “Blood, black magic, and virgins—three of my favorite things. And now incest? Is it my birthday? Why, yes it is. Of sorts.” He licked his lips and kissed her mouth. “Thank you for my presents. There’s a reason you’re my favorite.”
“You say that to everyone.”
“Yes, but in your case, I mean it.” He glanced at Cato. “So what do you think, Beri? Should we start with him in the middle?”
“What?” Cato choked.
Tamberi nodded and laughed.
“Don’t worry. I won’t ride you too long, Cato. There’s a lot to be done before sunrise. My angel enemy’s distracted by a girl, and I’ve risen before he’s got his bearings in that new body.” Gadreel stretched with lazy sensuality. “Did you follow all my instructions, Tamberi?”
“Yes, everything’s ready and in motion.”
“Beautiful. By morning, I’ll retrieve my ring, defile his girl, and cut out his wings.” Gadreel’s smile flashed wicked and bright. “Happy birthday.”
Nathaniel rubbed his chest as the piercing pain faded. For an instant, an inky blackness had fallen over his vision. Then, with a blink, it cleared, leaving a powerful urgency in its wake. Nathaniel pressed the gas pedal down and struggled to make sense of what he’d felt.
Hurry. The word beat in his mind like a drum. “Hurry where? To do what?” Nathaniel demanded.
He hadn’t recovered his memory yet. At least not fully. He was a soldier of Heaven. That had been a sharp realization that came without memory. He didn’t know how he’d come to be, but when he’d been confronted by the men from Etherlin Security, a knowledge of himself had emerged. In the same way that he knew his right hand from his left and how to wield a weapon, he knew he was an archangel, an instrument of God’s wrath, and that he was not meant to be examined or interrogated by men. Nathaniel had felt that if he’d stayed, the men would’ve become more insistent and the situation would have escalated to violence. Also, he’d felt a rising tide of jealousy and desire. When Kate had been friendly and familiar with the other men, a part of him had wanted to lay claim to her in the basest, most primal way.
He tightened his grip on the wheel. His passion for her had become volatile. He’d wanted to conquer her resistance, and that battle would have made the exchange between him and the men impossible to control. So when Kate refused to leave with him, he’d left her there, though even now he wanted to turn back.
What are she and I meant to be to each other?
No answer presented itself, but he realized that thoughts of her cooled the urgency that had overtaken him when he’d felt the pain in his chest. It was as though duty and desire pulled at different parts of his soul, each conquering the other in his mind from moment to moment. He shook his head, and then ran a hand through his hair to push it back from his face.