And so I told the story. In typical Ruth fashion, she did her best to extract the more pornographic details, but I managed to keep Sebastian's kinkiness largely under wraps.
"Sounds like quite a guy," she said when I was done.
I nodded slowly. "That he is. Honestly, it's a little intimidating. Every time I'm around him I seem to lose my head completely."
She flashed a knowing smile. "They're dangerous when they're that gorgeous."
"It's not just his looks." I shook my head. "I don't know if I can really explain it. There's just something about him that pushes all my buttons."
"Is it the accent? Fuck, I love a good accent." She leaned back in her chair and gazed up at the ceiling, a dreamy grin blooming on her face. "Remember that Spanish guy I was seeing a year or so back? God damn. He could read out the shopping list and I'd still get off."
"You did mention he had a talented tongue, but I didn't think that's what you meant."
She laughed. "That man had a variety of skills, most of which cannot be discussed in polite company. Anyway, it sounds like you're living the dream. Exclusive, casual sex with a gorgeous, mysterious millionaire. I dare say I'm a little envious."
"Yea it's pretty awesome." I tried my best to sound enthusiastic, but some part of my uncertainty must have leaked through, because her expression fell.
"So why don't you sound happy?" she asked.
"I am!" I sighed. It was frustrating how little I could hide from her. Who said best friends were a good idea anyway? "It's just, I'm kind of waiting for the other shoe to drop, you know?"
"Jesus. You really know how to look a gift horse in the mouth, don't you?"
"I'm not trying to. I just want to keep things in perspective. After what happened with Connor, I want to be a little more careful, that's all."
She grimaced and leaned in close, taking my hands in her. "Soph, listen to me. Connor was a one of a kind psychopath. He was a serial cheater who seemed to get off on lying to you. I've told you before, men might be assholes sometimes, but he was a special piece of work. They aren't all like that. You can't let that one experience cause you to shut up shop forever."
I nodded slowly. "I know."
"You need something to do besides work and drink, and if you ask me, this sounds perfect. A casual fling with a guy who is as busy as you are. Just take it slow and enjoy it for what it is."
"That's the plan."
"Good." She took a drink and then shook her head. "I swear, you don't know how lucky you are. This sort of thing doesn't come along all that often."
I thought back to our bizarre courtship. In the rational light of day, it barely seemed plausible at all. "I think I agree with you there."
CHAPTER TEN
The next few days were uneventful. A little of the Wrights case work trickled down to me, but nothing significant. I debated confronting Alan again, but I got the sense I'd already made a mistake complaining the first time. Pushing any more was likely to just make the situation worse. So instead, I swallowed my pride and focused on the tasks that were given to me.
I didn't hear anything from Sebastian. When we'd parted, we'd made no concrete plans to see each other again and that was fine with me. After all, what was the point of a casual fling if it filled your diary with obligations?
But as the days became a week, I began to grow uneasy. I wasn't expecting daily phone calls, but it felt like there should be some kind of communication. To make matters worse, I realised that I had no way of contacting him. I might have been able to find his building again if I really wanted to, but he'd never given me his phone number or even an email address. Our relationship effectively existed entirely on his whim.
"It's partially my fault I guess," I said to Ruth on the phone one night. "I should have asked for his number. But that doesn't make the situation any better. It's like I'm just lying around waiting until he feels like fucking me again."
"Isn't that what a casual relationship is?" she asked.
"I guess," I replied slowly, "but it's not supposed to be this one sided. What if I decide I'm in the mood?"
She laughed. "Feeling a little hot under the collar are we?"
As much as I hated to admit it, I was. My sex drive had never been much more than a low buzz in the background before, but my one night with Sebastian seemed to have kick started my libido something fierce. I found my eyes wandering much more than they used to, and my dreams had taken a notably erotic turn. It was quite inconvenient really.
"Maybe a little."
"Well," she continued, "I'm sure he didn't keep his number hidden on purpose. Just ask for it next time."
Knowing the sort of man Sebastian was, it wouldn't have surprised me if it had been intentional, but I didn't argue.
"What really bothers me is... what if there isn't a next time?" I said. "What if my gut was right and he was just looking for an easy lay?"
"A few days of silence is hardly a big deal. This is what you signed up for, remember? No fuss."
"I guess," I said again.
"And if it turns out he did take advantage of you, then yea he's an asshole, but worrying isn't going to change anything. Think of it this way; there are far worse things than one night stands with handsome foreign gentlemen who are great in bed."
I laughed. Ruth certainly knew how to put things in perspective.
I tried my best to take her advice to heart, but as more time passed, my restlessness grew. What was the threshold for when that sort of behaviour became unacceptable? Two weeks? A month? I had no idea. It felt like he'd gone to a lot of trouble just to sleep with me once and then drop me, but the evidence was growing increasingly hard to ignore.
Then one day nearly three weeks later, when I'd basically given up hope of ever seeing him again, I returned from a lunch meeting to find my office door open. Sebastian was leaning casually against my desk, suited, chiselled, and looking as dapper as ever.
"Seriously?" I hissed. Under other circumstances I might have reacted more calmly, but the way he stood there, smiling like his presence was totally normal, made my blood run hot.
"Still haven't got those greetings down pat yet, have you?" he replied, looking bemused at my dark expression.