“Thanks. I missed you.” He withdrew and gave her a playful slap on the butt, then disappeared into the bathroom.
The words spilled from his lips so easily.
Why had they been so hard for her to say?
Chapter Twenty-One
HAVEN HADN’T BEEN HOME IN A WHILE. SHE’D LEFT Oklahoma when she’d gotten the job offer from the network, had settled into her apartment in New York, and had stayed there, determined to make it work.
She’d almost quit, had almost packed up her things several times, determined to find a job back home. It had been her mother who’d forced her to stay in New York, had told her she should at least try before she gave it up.
And then the assignment to do Trevor’s feature story had come up.
Now, she still wasn’t certain this was the job she wanted to do for the rest of her life, but at least she was working.
“Excited to see home again?” Trevor asked as they pulled off the turnpike.
“Yes.” She was looking forward to seeing her mom. And dreading the visit home at the same time. For so many reasons, including reliving her father’s last days. She couldn’t help but feel the shroud of overwhelming sadness wash over her, remembering the last time she was here. She’d left a couple of weeks after her father died. She’d had to go back to Dallas—back to her job. She’d wanted to stay longer, but her mom had insisted she start working again. And then she’d gotten the new job in New York, and it had been a whirlwind of packing and travel, forcing her to put away her grief to deal with later.
Life went on, her mom said. And so did work. Even her mom had returned to work. It’s what we do, she’d said.
But Haven hadn’t felt much like working. All she’d wanted to do was be with her mom and try to make sense of a world without her father in it.
Nothing had made sense back then.
It still didn’t. Not without Dad. She still missed his counsel, still couldn’t believe she couldn’t pick up the phone and send him a text message, or call and talk to him whenever she felt like it.
He’d have been devastated about the Rivers’ loss. She’d have commiserated with him. They’d have talked about what went wrong, what the Rivers could have done better, and how they’d come back stronger next season. Her dad would have likely called Trevor as well, would give him a pep talk and tell him how well he’d played this season.
She wondered if Trevor was missing her dad. She wouldn’t ask him.
She took a deep breath.
“You okay over there?” Trevor asked.
“I’m fine. Just tired.”
“Oh, come on. You can’t be tired. Let’s get pumped here. I’m looking forward to seeing your mom.”
She liked his enthusiasm, but she knew why. “You’re looking forward to eating my mom’s cooking.”
Trevor grinned. “Yeah, there’s that, too.”
The camera crew was going to meet them down here tomorrow. Today, they’d have a reprieve, and she could focus on seeing her mom.
When they pulled onto the campus and she saw the familiar buildings and the streets where she’d grown up, she felt both a sense of calm and a melancholy she couldn’t shake. Everything was the same, and yet it was never going to be the same again.
She used to look forward to coming home, mainly because it was home. Mom and Dad were there, and she’d always felt safe and welcome here. The one thing she could always count on was a sense of family, of routine.
Now? It just felt . . . lonely. She didn’t know how her mother dealt with this every day.
But when they pulled into the driveway and she saw her mom come outside, her lips tilted.
Yes, this was still home. Mom was here. As soon as Trevor put the car in park, she unbuckled her seat belt and opened the door. Her mom came down the driveway and Haven threw herself into her mother’s waiting arms.
A hug had never felt so good.
“Oh, Haven, I missed you so much.”
She might never move from the comforting, welcoming feel of her mom’s embrace.
“I’ve missed you, too.”
Her mom took her hands and took a step back. “You look good. But you’ve lost weight.”
“No, I haven’t.”
“Yes, you have. A mother knows these things.”
A mother—her mother—always thought she wasn’t eating enough. It was just her way of wanting to feed her constantly. Not that Haven minded that, since she loved home cooking.
As she stepped back, she realized her mother was the one who’d lost weight. But not in a bad way. “You look awesome.”
Her mother grinned. “Thanks, honey.”
“And you,” her mom said, turning her attention to Trevor, who’d been patiently standing by Haven’s side. “You come here and give me a giant hug.”
Trevor scooped up Haven’s mom into a giant bear hug. “Hi, Miss Ginger. It’s good to see you.”
“Oh, you, too. You look amazing as always.”
“So do you,” he said after he set her down. “I’ll grab our bags while you two go inside.”
Haven walked in with her mom. “I made stew. It’s a little chilly out here today. It’s definitely startin’ to feel like fall—finally.”
“Stew sounds great, Mom.” She set her purse by the front door and followed the incredible smell into the kitchen.
“There’s a pitcher of sweet tea on the table.”
There always was. The only thing different was her dad’s place at the head of the table was now empty. Haven’s heart squeezed, but she tamped down that tug of painful emotion and pulled her chair out and took a seat. She poured a glass of tea and took several sips.
Her mom looked good as she bustled around the kitchen. Really good. Other than that, nothing much seemed to have changed. It had been a couple of months since she’d been back home.
She felt guilty about that. She spoke to her mother frequently on the phone, and she’d wanted to get back, but between ending her job in Dallas and starting the new one in New York, she’d been busy.
And maybe avoiding.
“I put your things up in your room, Haven,” Trevor said as he made his way into the kitchen.
“Thanks.”
“Did you put your stuff in the guest room, Trevor?” Haven’s mom asked.
“Yes, ma’am. Thanks for letting me bunk here.”