She sighed as he closed the door behind him. Then she flopped back on the couch and let out her breath like a sagging balloon.
Why couldn’t she be attracted to Damon? He seemed open enough to the things she wanted. Hell, he’d even watched her suck off another man, and for some inexplicable reason, that didn’t creep her out. It titillated her in an odd way.
Who knew she was a closet sex maniac? Okay, not maniac. One instance of public acts didn’t relegate her to nympho status. What was surprising to her was her reaction to the various scenarios she’d witnessed last night.
She’d seen things that by all rights should horrify a girl like her. Instead, she’d watched with breathless wonder, a new awakening dawning inside her. But. The proverbial but cropped up. She wasn’t sure she wanted to experience them so clinically. Like an exhibition at a freak show.
The club, while very enlightening, wasn’t what she really wanted. What she wanted was to be taken on a similar journey, but she wanted the journey to be real. Not a trumped-up show for an audience. And she wanted a man who would take care of her every need.
A man like Gray.
No matter how many circles she turned in, she always ended up right back at the central point of all her struggles: Gray.
It seemed abundantly clear to her that Gray fit the bill on so many levels. Only problem was, he didn’t seem to agree. He was fighting his attraction to her way too damn much. Why? That she didn’t know. But she suddenly became very determined to find out.
CHAPTER 21
Finding out proved to be more frustrating than she’d possibly imagined. If Faith was determined, then Gray was even more so. Determined to avoid her, that is.
She’d gone over to his apartment not long after Damon’s visit. He hadn’t answered the door, even though she knew damn well he was home. Coward.
Later, she’d gone by Cattleman’s when she knew he’d be getting together with Micah and the others. Only when she arrived, Gray had beat a hasty retreat, mumbling something about an appointment he’d forgotten. And Micah had stared intently at her, probing enough that she had no doubt he knew at least some of what she’d done.
Hell. At least now she knew how Gray got her car back to her apartment. At least he hadn’t asked Connor to go with him. She would have had to kill him over that.
Faith ended up staying and having a few drinks with Nathan, Connor and Micah, since it would look pretty suspicious if she left on Gray’s heels. So she hung around like she hadn’t come looking for Gray at all.
And Micah had watched her the entire evening like he was trying to pry every one of her secrets right out of her head. By the time she did end up leaving, she couldn’t get out quick enough.
Sunday was more of the same. She went over to Gray’s apartment early. He didn’t answer the door. Which was pretty silly, and it was really grating on her last nerve. She saw him leave in the early afternoon, and she was tempted to follow him until she thought about how stalkerish that would come across.
She’d catch him at work the next morning. He couldn’t avoid her forever.
Monday morning she made sure she was in the office early. Coffee was made, donuts were laid out, and she waited for Gray to make his appearance.
He walked in with Micah and never met her gaze. Micah was more than happy to grab a cup of coffee and stuff his mouth full of a donut. But Gray retreated to his office, leaving Micah behind.
With a firm set to her lips, she poured a cup of coffee for Gray, snatched up a donut and headed for his office. If he’d locked her out, so help her God, she’d have someone break the door down.
It wasn’t locked, but it was still difficult for her to navigate the door with her hands full. As she elbowed her way in, Gray looked up from his desk.
“What the hell are you trying to do, burn yourself?” he exclaimed as he rushed around to take the coffee from her faltering fingers.
She slapped the donut on his desk and leveled a glare at him. “I was being nice. Friendly. You know, sociable. Something I can’t say for you.”
He swallowed hard and emitted a weary sigh. “Look, Faith, it’s best…it’s best if we just forget Friday night ever happened. I can’t even begin to tell you how sorry I am that I stepped over the line like that.”
She narrowed her eyes and put a hand on her hip. “Well, I’m not.”
He blinked in confusion. “You’re not what?”
“I’m not sorry,” she said through gritted teeth. She planted both palms on his desk and leaned over until they were eye to eye. “You pretending it didn’t happen doesn’t make it true. It happened, Gray, and I want to talk about more than just forgetting it. I can’t forget it.”
He cupped her chin in his hand. “Faith, let it go. Please. Nothing good can come of us rehashing it. I wanted to teach you a lesson. I didn’t like the idea of you being in there. You’re a sweet girl. I like you a lot. I hope to hell you never go back. You weren’t supposed to like it.”
Flames scorched up her neck until her head threatened to boil over and explode.
Sweet girl. Teach a lesson. I like you a lot. What the effing hell was all that hogwash?
She tried to speak, but nothing came out. She was honest to God too pissed to formulate a coherent or even an incoherent sentence.
Finally she threw up her hands and made an arrggg sound before she stormed out of his office. By the time she made it back to the front, she was seething. Micah made a quick escape once he got a look at her. Smart guy.
Once he was out, she did something she rarely ever did. She shut her office door, a clear beacon to anyone not to enter. She could count on one hand the times she’d resorted to such drastic measures since coming to work for Pop. Now certainly qualified as a necessary time.
She tossed the donuts in the trash and poured the coffee down the drain, never mind that the others hadn’t been the one to piss her off. But they’d suffer her wrath just like Gray.
When she was through with her huff, she flopped into her swivel chair and turned her gaze up to the ceiling.
She needed a vacation. A break. Something. Between her mother driving her to drink, her foray into a risqué sex club, and Gray driving her crazy, she was ready for the white suits to come bearing an I-love-me jacket and take her to a padded cell.
Running away wasn’t something she’d ever been tempted to do. All her life, she’d stuck with it, even when sticking with it meant supporting an incompetent mother and her many vices. No, Faith wasn’t a quitter. She had too much work ethic ingrained in her. Closest she’d ever come to running away from anything was when her mother had overdosed and Pop and Connor had come and all but dragged her home with them.