Sweet God, he was losing himself in her and he couldn’t help it. He couldn’t hold it back. He needed more and more, until he shafted into her with hard, hungry thrusts. Until he felt her exploding, heard her screaming his name as he locked inside her again, spilling his release and growling her name like a demented animal that could find sanity nowhere else but in this woman’s arms.
He had hurt her, wounded her pride, he knew that. Her safety was more important. His peace of mind was more secure knowing the risk of being his coya was no longer something he needed to fear.
Instead, he had only to fear that strange, quiet place inside her that he could feel growing darker. The animal knew it was there. Knew its mate was holding back, holding on. And it, as well as the man, demanded all of her.
He would have all of her. Or he would never survive it.
CHAPTER 21
Anya moved through the community room three days later, pausing to pick up newspapers, magazines and various items of trash that now littered it.
She’d been relegated to being a f**king housekeeper, it seemed. Nothing was picked up anymore, nothing was put away properly, and she was doing it herself. At least when Sharone, Emma and Ashley were with her, there were able hands willing to help with the process.
There was none of that now. She hadn’t seen the girls in three days, and she missed them.
“Jax, hand me your empty bottles please,” she asked one of the Coyotes sprawled on a couch as he watched the huge television mounted to the wall.
Jax leaned to the side instead to see around her, and gave her room to pick the bottles up herself.
“It would be easier if you handed them to me,” she told him with an edge of amusement.
His gaze slid back to her. “Be easier for me if you pick them up yourself.”
Anya froze at the deliberate disrespect and straightened, leaving the bottles where they were sitting.
“Come on, Anya, you’re in the damned way,” he growled. “Let me watch television.”
It was deliberate, a reminder that she had no rights above even the lowest of the soldiers at the moment. She was no longer coya; she wasn’t even an acknowledged mate. She was Del-Rey’s lover, nothing more. There was no male willing to stand for her, and that left her at the mercy of the beasts who would push her, taunt her and eventually force her to either stay out of their way or risk their lives if she tattled on them.
They were testing her, and she had known it was coming; she just hadn’t expected it to come so soon.
She left the bottles on the table and moved through the room, leaving the rest of the disarray as it was. She was aware of the other Breeds watching her as well, eyes narrowed, some in disapproval, some in curiosity, as she moved into the kitchen.
But there was one gaze that had shame curling in her stomach. Sofia. She was still there, and the other woman knew.
Anya disposed of the garbage she carried into the kitchen, then stared around at the dishes piled haphazardly in the large sink. There were dirty skillets and cookers on the stoves and cabinets. The door had been left open on one of the ovens.
The kitchen was a mess.
“Who has rotation this week?” she asked Cavalier as he stepped into the room from another door.
He looked around the room. “Wolves and Felines were taken off rotation. One of the pack leaders was assigned to keep rotation in here, but I’m not certain which one.”
“Thank you,” she said tightly as she moved to the sink and felt her shoulders want to sink in despair.
“You could stop this,” Cavalier said behind her. “One word is all it would take.”
“And what word would that be?” She shook her head.
She turned on the hot water, stopped the sink and prepared a soak for the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher.
“We swore loyalty to him because of you,” Cavalier told her. “Because you were by his side and your scent reassured us that no matter the problems you were having, he was still loyal to you. He’s no longer showing that loyalty.”
Anya turned around slowly.
“He’s an able commander and alpha,” she said roughly.
His dark face was stoic, his eyes fierce as thick, long, burnished dark blond hair framed his face.
“He is at that.” He nodded. “But a man isn’t judged on his abilities to lead well, Coya.”
“Don’t call me that, Cavalier,” she whispered. “I’m no longer your coya.”
“You are our coya,” he stated, a flare of anger filling his voice now. “We followed him, we swore our allegiance to him, because he was yours. Not because you belonged to him. He doesn’t shit on what we claim as our own and still command that loyalty.”
“No,” she said fiercely. “You just don’t understand his reasons. Let it go, Cavalier.”
“All we need is a single word, and we walk,” he stated. “If he’s mistreating you, none of us will remain under his command.”
How could she ever have considered this Breed dead inside? When she first met him, he’d had the same look on his face as he had now. Expressionless, his eyes cold—but in those cold amber eyes there was more than she had ever seen.
She saw it now. A feral fury, a dedication and complete loyalty. She had read his file from the other lab. She had known he’d been marked for death when she convinced her father he was a candidate for the training program at the Chernov labs.
She’d been fourteen. He had never reached out to her or anyone else, until now.
“He doesn’t mistreat me,” she swore.
He growled fiercely. “Neither does he show his respect for you. Until he does, there’s not a single Coyote, except those who knew you before, that will show you respect. There will be fights.” He glared at her. “Blood will spill. Because there’s not one of us that will stand by and allow it.”
He swung away from her then and stalked from the room.
“Dissension in the ranks, how interesting,” Sofia drawled from the other doorway. “Shouldn’t Del-Rey know about this?”
Anya swung around in surprise and faced the other woman. Great. Perfect. Just what the hell she needed.
“Whatever you think he needs to know,” she bit out before shoving dishes into the water to soak.
Silence filled the room.
“He’s not doing you any favors, Anya,” Sofia said then. “Del-Rey can be damned strange on a good day, and he has all these quirky little ideas about protecting the people he cares about. He’s not protecting you like this. He just thinks he is.”