Strong arms surrounded me, and I drew in a breath, terrified, and only then realizing that I’d been the one doing the screaming.
“Deep breaths, baby. I’ve got you. Just take some deep breaths. You’re safe. You’re with me and you’re safe.” Evan’s voice washed over me, warm and commanding, as if simply by saying that I was safe he could make it so. I was sitting upright, clutching tight to him. My arms were around him, my hands fisted in the back of his T-shirt.
The sheet had tumbled away to gather at my waist, and my breasts were pressed against him. His hands, big and warm and strong, gently stroked my bare back as I gulped in air, trying to shake free of the tendrils of fear that still clung to me, cold and menacing.
“You’re safe,” he repeated gently. “You’re okay.”
I nodded, realizing as I did that I was starting to believe it. I was awake. I was safe. I was warm in the security of Evan’s arms.
I’m not sure how long he held me like that. All I know is that by the time I finally did pull away, he’d given me enough of his strength to make it the rest of the way on my own.
“Better now?”
I nodded, then sat upright on the bed, one leg tucked under me. I took the tissue he handed me and blew my nose.
“Was it about Gracie?”
I closed my eyes in silent acknowledgement. “It was like I was there. The men. They were attacking her. They had knives. They were coming at her. But I couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t move. I wasn’t there—not really. But I had to watch. I had to watch, because it shouldn’t have been her at all. It should have been me.”
Once again, the tears burst forth, and he gathered me into his arms. I thought that I should pull away or curl up into a ball or tell him to leave me be for just a little while until I managed to get my act together. But I didn’t. I didn’t have the strength, but more than that, I didn’t have the desire.
For so long, I’d been fighting the nightmares by myself. To have Evan beside me now, giving me both strength and comfort was like opening the biggest present on Christmas morning.
He stroked my back slowly, but I could feel the tension in his touch. “I should have just walked away.”
I didn’t have a clue what he was talking about, and I pulled away only long enough to look at him with curiosity.
“In the alley,” he explained. “I should have taken you back inside the club. I should have walked away from those assholes. Gone inside. Called a bouncer. Just gotten clear. Anything to get you away from there.” He cupped my cheek with his palm. “I didn’t think. I wanted you—goddammit, I wanted you so fucking much—and I just didn’t think about what you’d see. What you’d think.”
My eyes were wide. “No, oh, god, Evan, no. You were brilliant. You were perfect.”
“I didn’t feel perfect when I saw you cowering on the asphalt. Or now, when you wake screaming from a nightmare.”
I could see the emotion in his face, along with the frustration. This was a man prone to action—but how do you fight fear and nightmares? He would have, though. If there was a way, I was certain he would have gone into battle for me, just like any proper knight.
The thought was almost enough to make me smile.
I didn’t, though. Instead, I said, “I have them every night. They cling to me. You didn’t bring the nightmares, Evan. Not even close.” I shifted position, pulled into motion by the need to make him understand. “But what you did in the alley—I wish someone like you had been at Gracie’s side that night. Someone who could have protected her. Who could have—” My voice hitched in my throat, and I felt a single tear snake down my cheek.
Evan brushed it away with the pad of his thumb. “I would end those bastards right now, if I could.” His voice was so tight I thought it might break. “For what they did to your sister. For what they took from you. And for the fear they left behind.”
I swallowed, undone by the ferocity that he was barely holding in. A feral determination that was so raw, so primal, it took my breath away. Our eyes locked, and for a moment I thought I would fall inside of him, both of us tumbling away from reality into some world that was uniquely ours.
Then he pulled me roughly against him, and I knew that we had to stay here. This world. This reality. But with Evan beside me, maybe I could stand it.
“Angie,” he said, then caught my mouth with his. His kiss was rough, in sharp contrast to the tenderness of his touch. I matched him, my need frantic. Intense. I was desperate to get lost in him, to go to that place where reason and memory and fear and regret evaporated. To leave everything behind except the reality of Evan and Angie and heat and need.
This was what I’d wanted. What I’d fantasized about. This man in my bed. His body hard against mine. His hands upon me, his tongue tasting me.
We were wild. Frenzied. As if we’d both exploded into supernovas of passion. One of his hands clutched my head, holding me in place as we devoured each other with kisses. The other roamed my back, palm flat, each bit of skin that he caressed lighting up in the wake of his touch until I was sure that I glowed as bright as the sun.
I was wide open to him in so many ways, and when I felt his hand cup my breast, I gasped from the sweet pleasure of the inevitable. “Yes,” I murmured. “Oh, please, yes.”
His hands moved to my shoulders, then stroked down my arms even as his gaze roamed down my body, making my nipples tighten as his eyes dipped toward my chest. “God, Angie, do you have any idea—”
I didn’t know what idea I was supposed to have because his words were cut off when he thrust me backward onto the bed, then moved to straddle me. I was trapped beneath him with his groin right over mine. I was naked but for the panties, so wet now that I was certain they clung to my body like a second skin.
I was completely exposed to him—completely open to him. He could do anything to me in that moment. Take me any way he wanted. I was completely and utterly his, and that knowledge made my pulse skitter and my skin tingle. I held my breath, not knowing what would come next, but only that I craved it. Craved him.
His lips skimmed the curve of my ear, then down the soft skin of my neck, the feather soft contact designed to drive me wild. Slowly, he traced my collarbone with the tip of his tongue before moving lower still.
I groaned with delighted abandon as he closed his mouth over my breast, his teeth teasing my nipple as he suckled me, sending threads of fire to shoot from my breasts all the way to my throbbing, needy sex.