I pressed my lips together to stop the giggle escaping then I said, “Douchebag isn’t a really nice word but, that said, your father is entitled to his opinion.”
Grady kept speaking. “Uncle Slim puts up with him but I think he does it for Mom and Aunt Jill ‘cause they like ‘im but Uncle Levi thinks he’s a douchebag too. I heard him and Uncle Slim talkin’ when Uncle Slim told Uncle Levi to cool it about Grandpa because it was bothering Aunt Jill but Uncle Levi said that Grandpa never paid child report and he had a bunch of girlfriends other than Grandma so he didn’t owe him anything and neither did Aunt Jill.”
Apparently, Grady had a mind like a sponge though he got one thing wrong. Child report I was guessing was child support and I was also guessing having a father that didn’t pay it and played around on your Mom was not good.
“I like Grandpa!” Ellie piped up.
“Of course you do, honey,” I said, smiling at her from my place leaning against the counter.
“I put up with him like Uncle Slim,” Grady announced.
“Grady’s gonna be Uncle Slim when he grows up,” Dylan, sporting a milk mustache, shared.
Grady did not challenge this information. Instead, he declared proudly, “He played first base and I play first base. He played linebacker and I play linebacker. His job is scary, Mom says, but he does it to keep kids like me safe so that’s what I’m gonna do too. When I get old, I’m gonna keep kids safe.”
I was feeling warm and gushy again.
“That’s a fantastic goal, Grady,” I said quietly.
“Do you got kids?” Dylan asked.
“No, honey, I don’t have any kids.”
“That’s good. When you marry Uncle Slim, you can be Mom to Rex and Joel,” Grady offered and I blinked.
“Sorry, honey, who?”
“Rex and Joel, Uncle Slim’s kids, our cousins,” Grady told me, my body went completely still including my heart and lungs, the warm gushiness evaporated and Grady kept talking.
“Aunt Olivia used to be married to Uncle Slim and Mom, Dad, Grandma, Grandpa, Aunt Jill, Uncle Fritz and Uncle Levi aren’t her biggest fans. I’m really not allowed to say the word Mom calls her. Dad too. And Uncle Levi said if he saw her again, he’d break her neck.”
I stared at him.
“She has a pinchy face,” Ellie added to the conversation, making her own scrunchy face that stated clearly she felt the same about Aunt Olivia as everyone else did.
“She never brings snickerdoodles to the family reunions,” Dylan put in then sucked back more milk before he musingly went on, “Or anything.”
“She wouldn’t think about snickerdoodles. She doesn’t care about snickerdoodles. Mom says she only cares about looking good and that’s why she’s always gettin’ her nails done,”
Grady authoritatively told Dylan.
“She has pretty nails,” Ellie told me. “I like her nail polish even though it’s almost always red. She should try pink.”
Although I was nowhere near processing the information they’d provided me, Grady kept spouting it. “She brings Rex and Joel to the family reunion every year and she stays and Mom says she stays even though she’s not family anymore just to show off her fancy outfits and be a wet blanket. I can’t say why Uncle Levi said she does it because most of the words are bad.”
Uncle Levi clearly had a mouth much like his brother.
And Brock Lucas had an ex-wife and two sons. A pinchy-faced ex-wife who had a perma-manicure and two sons.
This, I did not know. This, a thing you shared. This, I did not know what to do with.
To be fair, I had known Brock as Brock for three days.
Still.
“Can I be your flower girl when you marry Uncle Slim?” Ellie asked.
Again, my body, lungs and heart went completely still then the latter two started pumping and when they did this, they did it hard.
Damn! Now how did I answer that?
I decided on honesty.
“Right now we’re just seeing each other, Ellie, but I’ll keep a line open to you if it looks like it’s getting serious,” I promised and she giggled.
Then she placed her order. “Okay, but I want my dress to be pink.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” I told her and she grinned at me.
She had a milk mustache too.
I grinned back.
The door swung open and people flooded through starting with Laura and ending with Fern, Brock sandwiched in the middle. He came direct to me, eyes on my face and my eyes slid away. Fern went direct to the table to gather glasses. Laura started herding kids.
“All right, kiddos,” Laura started, snatching a towel from a rack, “wipe off those milk mustaches and inspect Uncle Slim’s living room for your stuff. We’re packed up and in the car in five minutes. March!”
Grady grabbed the towel, swiped his face, tossed it vaguely in his mother’s direction and raced out. Dylan followed suit. Ellie skipped to her mother like she had all the time in the world to tiptoe through the tulips, rubbed the towel across her face once mostly smearing milk and not lapping it up then she skipped out.
“So sorry about crashing your date, Tess,” Laura said, pushing the towel back on the rack.
“We were just driving by, saw Slim’s truck and bike and that’s unusual so we took our shot.
We’ll be out of your hair before you know it.”
“Not a problem,” I told her on a smile, feeling Brock leaning into the counter with a hip, the front of his body facing my side but I kept my eyes glued to his sister at the table.
Laura smiled back and stated, “I’ll have to bring the kids to your bakery. They’ll love it.
I’ve been in a couple times but never with the kids, just to pick things up. Ellie talks about your pink cupcakes all the time.”
“Give me a warning call and I’ll batten down the hatches,” I quipped and her smile got bigger as Brock’s body got closer and when I say this, I mean his arm circled my ribcage, he turned me so that now I was leaning one hip against the counter and the rest of me was pressed back against him.
Laura’s eyes dropped to his arm, they warmed then she looked back at my face and was grinning like a madwoman again.
At this point, Fern dampened the mood by proclaiming, “Slim, I hope that doesn’t happen often.”